with a Relationship Therapist in your pocket
Lead the Change
You're starting to believe that this is all there is.
This is the only way your relationship is going to be.
What more can you do? And can you even be bothered?
Time and time again, you've tried.
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You've swallowed your anger at the apparent apathy; you've made yourself vulnerable and you've reached out. The rejection stings every time. It feels like you're the only one who sees there's anything wrong and the only one who believes that things can get better than this.
But your own commitment to this idea is being exhausted.
It's isolating, confusing and draining. What more can you do?
The round and round merry-go-round of reaching out and then feeling the sting of rejection is just never-ending.
Why does it constantly feel like you’re the only one making the effort?
Repeating the same things over and over again?
Asking for what you want AGAIN?
You’re not alone and you’re not the only one; but the feeling is real and you’re in the right place!
I’m Ashley, a therapist specialising in relationships for the past (almost) 10 years and well seasoned in supporting couples and individuals who are feeling a bit lonely and hopeless and have often reached a fork in the road; does the relationship have to end? Or is there another way…
What I do know from my years of experience is that it can sometimes feel like another battle on your hands to get your partner on board for the kind of external help that will make a difference.
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I also know that embarking on individual therapy can be absolutely phenomenal for personal development, but can sometimes leave you feeling even further away from your relationship and how you’d want things to be.
Almost as if moving closer to yourself has come with the price tag of moving away from your partner.
This isn’t because individual therapy is flawed, but having a couples specialist in your camp can help bridge the gap between what you want for yourself and how that can come to life with your partner.
Sound good?
This isn’t about more hopeless bids for connection or trying to change your partner - in fact, I would urge you to stop that now.
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Whilst you’re at it, stop trying to make them think like you or wishing they would; they won’t!
Instead, start thinking about how you want to participate in this relationship in a way that feels good and isn’t bypassing your needs and wants.
If you're a woman who is ready to create some change in your relationship, come along with me for the next 6 weeks and let me hold your hand in making some changes that actually support you to evolve your experience of your relationship.
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Let me help you reach a space that doesn’t mean fighting to change them or wishing them into being more like you, but instead finding a new place to meet each other.
Nothing can change unless it changes, but perhaps you’ve been trying to shoehorn your relationship into something that is never going to be a good fit? To change things based on how you think the way things should be?
Tell me more Ash...
A start to be confirmed over the coming weeks, but to give you a sneak peak this is what to expect over the 6 weeks we have together we will share an intimate space with a maximum of 10 women.
This isn’t the same as individual therapy or couples therapy; I am running this as a small group container because:
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I believe that there is huge value in realising you’re not alone in this experience. Being in spaces where you can experience unconditional positive regard, at a time when you are experiencing a degree of rejection in your relationship, is comforting, nourishing, and supports courageous action.
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Witnessing other women navigating change is emboldening.
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Holding space for others when things don’t go to plan supports us to access our own inner wisdom, and to draw upon it more easily when we need it for ourselves.
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Expanding our perceptions of what is possible within our relationships and what has helped shape these perceptions is invaluable to making sustainable changes.
Our time together will be explored with the backdrop of my professional experience and understanding of the developmental stages of our couple relationships, how our family backgrounds influence the way we relate and how to integrate the tools in to your life that will create change whilst acknowledging the disruption and navigating the challenges that can bring.
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I will use my experience and expertise of working for almost 10 years with couples and individuals like you and seeing hundreds of clients to help you:
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Uncover the things that are standing in the way of YOUR fulfilling, happy relationship
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Equip you to take the lead to create the kinds of changes that your partner is most likely to get on board in collaboration with you.
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Out-manoeuvre the relationship myths that distract you from meaningful change.
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Build the resilience that’s required to sustain the shifts.
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We will explore some of the impasses you find yourself caught up in and what may be contributing to that sense of being stuck.
In practical terms, this looks like me, available to you via whatsapp 4 days a week (including a weekend day), supporting you to prepare for, and debrief from challenging conversations, holding your struggles and celebrating your successes.
One of the limiting aspects of traditional therapy models is the delay between an event occurring in the relationship, and the opportunity to receive support. This can mean that lots of time is spent picking over incidents gone by, and ignoring what’s coming up. I am excited to observe how this more dynamic way of working could accelerate progress for the women in the group.
You don’t have to do it alone. You don’t have to wait, and hope and pray that they will change their mind about therapy - they might, but why wait until you're on your knees or even knee-deep in your exit plan?
As well as the immeasurable benefits of being in touch with me between session time, this program of work together includes:
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Group zoom meetups where everyone has the chance to ask questions, share insights and soak up the community vibe. These will be recorded and available during the 6 weeks we have together.
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Short teaching videos to enable you to learn tried and tested techniques, or to develop your perspective on what a healthy relationship looks like. These will be yours to access and revisit at your leisure.
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A group space (platform TBC) to share insights, ask questions, vent, celebrate and everything in between.
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A 1:1 session to be taken any time over the 6 weeks.
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Investment: £333
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Drop me a message here if you'd like to chat, ask any questions, discuss payment plans or if you're ready to say yes
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I'm ready...
I AM IN
FAQs
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Q: Do I need to attend live?
A: Nope...I know you’re probably already spinning enough plates, so the zoom meets will be recorded and available for the 6 weeks we are together + 2 2 weeks to catch up and the other teachings and space will be available to visit ongoing.
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Q: Will I be required to participate or share info?
A: You will never be required to share anything you're not comfortable with. There will be no awkward on the spot requests, but I think that in order to get what you came for - sharing will be part of it.
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Q: Does my partner need to attend anything?
A: Nope. This is a program designed specifically for you to attend on your own. Of course any of the things you learn, can be shared with your partner.
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Q: Is this therapy?
A: No. There will be therapeutic elements to this as I am a Relationship Therapist and my practice is informed by my extensive training and experience.
About Ashley
Ashley is an experienced York based therapist specialising in Relationships.
She runs a thriving private practice offering individual and couples therapy and online workshops.
Ashley is a Mother to 3 children and has a special interest in the transitions in to parenthood and finding the balance in your relationship.